Thank you, too, for your reputation of hiring models free of silicone and liposuction. At least, that is what I have been told time and again over the years. Sure, your Angels have the measurements of lab-created Amazonians, and I know airbrushing is involved in the printing of your magazines…BUT the idea of models that are natural in their body parts helps to ebb my envy. After all, how could you make money off of your push-up bras if your models had breasts that didn't need pushing up? A "thanks" can be thrown out to Tyra Banks for when she admitted to the magic of the push-up for her southward-moving, au natural boobs. Keep it real, girl.
But most importantly, thank you, Victoria's Secret, for your semi-annual sales so that those of us who hate to pay $50 for one bra can (for once) afford to buy as much sexy as we can handle because the price of the bra suddenly dropped to $15. My wardrobe has benefitted from such sales, supplementing my work wear with comfy sweaters and my vacation wear with colorful tees.
So thank you, Victoria's Secret, for everything you have done for women (and their men) all over the planet. A little sexy goes a long way.
But here's where my thanks hangs a question mark. Everything you create is in the name of sexy, especially your line of lingerie. In fact, I would bet that women have worn your leather and lace in an attempt to woo their husbands to their bedchambers, which later resulted in…
That's right. Woman makes a trip to your store, which leads to the purchase of a lacy teddy. Woman wears lacy teddy, leading to the seduction of the husband. Husband seduced. Teddy gets thrown across the room. Night gets all steamy. And weeks later, there's a plus sign on an at-home pregnancy test.
So here comes Victoria's Secret with their line of maternity clothes to make pregnant women everywhere feel sexy despite their swollen ankles and bulging bellies.
Pipe dream. This is where you duck out, Victoria's Secret, disappointing the preggos who have been ever so faithful to you before getting knocked up. Why have you drawn the line with maternity wear? Afraid of models with stretch marks? Fear that some customers would run the other way, offended by a woman with child modeling a silky cami?
Allow me to bring up one of your current Angels, Miranda Kerr. In our house, she is known as "Michael's girlfriend". This is because (according to Michael) she is the only model to grace your magazine's pages without casting the look of a hungry praying mantis ready to feast on her lover's brains. Some of your other models' attempts at making "bedroom eyes" in photos come off as scary rather than seductive. Miranda Kerr (seen in the picture below) is most certainly sexy, but is so because she's so darn cute. All of her photos radiate just how adorable she is. Even I want to pinch her dimpled cheeks! So when we noticed her disappearance from your magazine, Michael and I were left disheartened. Why was our favorite VS model suddenly gone?
|Cute as a button.|
But just look at her with her pregnant belly! She's still adorable. She's obviously glowing. She's loving her belly growing a baby. And she's still sexy.
|I'd buy maternity clothes from VS if Miranda was modeling them.|
And if you felt you had to have a separate magazine for belly-hugging apparel, we would be OK with that. We promise not to take offense at advertisement segregation for the differing clothing types. We just want to see you try your hand in the world of maternity.
Again, a huge thanks to you, Victoria's Secret, for making women everywhere feel sexy. I simply ask that you not abandon the ones you helped get pregnant. Nine months of receiving your magazines in the mail, knowing we couldn't possibly fit into anything you advertise (especially in your semi-annnual sale catalogues) is nothing but a cruel tease.
Oh, and thanks for bringing Miranda Kerr back after she had her baby. We were thrilled to see her smiling face in the latest catalogue. Life after baby does exist, and it can be sexy!
|Post-baby, and still beautiful.|