18 January 2011

Amazonian Pygmies Attack

I'm 5 days early.  That's right, ladies and other ladies (I figure the male types stay away from menses talk).  5 whole days!  Last go-around, I was 10 days LATE.  Now I'm 5 days early?  While on Femara?  At a higher concentration than the 2 months I was on Clomid?

What the HELL?

Being this early is like having Amazonian pygmy warriors stage a sneak attack on your uterus wearing tribal masks and carrying 5-foot spears.  They are thirsty for blood, having no mercy in their take-no-prisoners assault on your womanly parts.  With their high-pitched war cries and crazy-eyed stares, all you can do is wait for the end of the massacre.

And how did this affect the results of my progesterone levels I had tested only last Friday?

It plummeted… to a flippin' 2.2.  I about had a stroke.

Apparently, the stupid pygmy warriors not only took my uterus hostage, but they laid claim to my pituitary gland, tied it up to a wooden stake, and roasted it over a bonfire next to their sacrificial wild boar.

Time to go throw things…

3 comments:

Laura said...

You just got awarded the Stylish Blogger Award because you are one of my favorite blogs! See this post for details: http://baaremans.blogspot.com/2011/01/and-stylish-blogger-award-goes-to.html

A. Hab. said...

Sigh. I hate this for you, I really do. :( Did you call your doctor today?

I hope you found something to throw. You deserve to throw something right now.

Rachael said...

Vickie, you have the most well written blog. Even when you aren't smiling you find a way to make us smile. Praying, praying for you.
Rach

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